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<td class=\you can not change, even the effects are impossible. Everyone seems to be in accordance with the trajectory of life before the trip, so smooth Yihuo stumbled, but, man, she saw our existence, we scenery Yihuo abjection, we cry Yihuo laugh. Sometimes we hate her throat, because in the past by her glance, as had been stripped naked children. Sometimes grateful, because she has been in, she saw our lives and set-off at some point in our lives some kind of gesture. Heavy rain the night, or a warm afternoon sun, occasionally going to miss her smile, and then a warm heart will float to the surface ripples - and sisters.
  very, very long time,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], I do not think that Lin won me over in any place.
  our county is famous in China, because of poverty, but also because a certain leader of the immortal achievements, make a reputation.
  was poor and famous, making a running train if the Longhai line speed again, it will be in this kind a dilapidated station Yudong wait a minute or two, so the poor and well-known local load to a piece of land rich advanced studies.
  when we go to high school, surprisingly good quality of education in the county. Almost every year, five counties in Kaifeng City, scored a rating in the countryside to capture the lead. County gathered in the vast majority of this county's outstanding students.
  high school, I was silent in class is the ugly duckling of a humble, hold the north of the second fan in the classroom shrinking window seat. Because of family reasons, I grew to develop eccentric, stubborn character, who often refuse to thousands of miles away. And, three days a good boy for me when, on the next class, to become personal,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], like after high school, did not look at me. I feel lost.
  So, I almost have no friends. Alone and free day in a noisy crowded schools.
  science I did not do well, high school, when no division, my grades are always flat light, there is no improvement, which the teacher will not have mercy with their eyes and give me even five seconds.
  time popular Gigi Leung's \Is exceptionally like.
  half of the semester to a sophomore, I began to become very popular arts talent. I'm good at writing, always ranked number one liberal arts classes language exam. History, politics, let alone families.
  So I flew up the branches, the sparrows moult into Phoenix. Began to enjoy other people envy and class and subject teachers of love.
  my character was not so optimistic, I am still a loner, because the advantages of performance, behavior, withdrawn from the previous update as aloof. Only I know that my heart is still dripping with an indiscriminate and marginal, low self-esteem, sensitive lakes.
  Volunteers of incorrectly junior year when I accidentally get the job, I am firmly opposed to sharp stepmother in the back of a repeat. I find her a good husband Trustee, a neighboring village a boy soldier in Tibet. Dowry to give her a lot of money. The man, I have seen one, did not finish the first two days to drop out of school, two years older than me, people high and black is definitely not my type.
  at the insistence of his father and sister, and I repeat back to school. Because it is not easy, I have to work hard than other students.
  repetition that is in the winter, the second time the snow started flying the sky, a lotus from the town high school to our school, our class became my classmate.
  I do not belong to the kind of pleasant girls, childhood nutrition ineffective, and often in the fields of sunlight exposure, coupled with cold and lack of management stepmother, I have been black, thin, brow women did not have the slightest revealed traces of charming children.
  Lotus was not tall, big stack of two-eyes, bushy eyebrows embedded in the bottom, stare and colorful. Her stature overweight, but not fat, thick black hair hanging in the shoulder occasion. Petite lips to reveal it demonstrated her stubbornness. She compared me to much publicity, is also a poor family of us, but because parents and two brothers nourishment to her little family of my self-esteem and excessive sensitivity.
  She likes to read poetry, classical, modern covers all, like poetry, but also likes to write poems, my mind there are many unrealistic. She was skipping school to see the original boyfriend, away for four days, followed by the class teacher came back to quarrel in front of the class face contradict him.
  honest, I almost admire her, and we are stubborn, are capricious. She is not no secret of the kind of aggressive type of depression. I have always been quietly, hidden stick to their inferiority complex. Therefore, many years later, my life has so distorted the rough, miserable.
  her unique and all of a sudden the poor families of our common closer to the distance between me and her, we are not close friends, but heart to heart, enjoy each other. Lower middle of her performance, was excluded class was the class students as foreigners, have made me feel close. And, like her doll face and short and fleshy body is not my exclusive glamorous type.
  In short, we get along exceptionally harmonious, not competitors, not each other jealous.
  give birth at that time life has been strange Ni side. Lin a good relationship with the boyfriend, in addition to the family, her early life, have a love moist. And I, almost exactly a year, girls in the class ranked in the top of the results, but I almost did not love. When the second semester, Song of the goodwill that I revel in the love hidden happiness. Superior to his family, his father in the county government in positions, repeat twice, he tied a thick life-like cocoon, and he cast a write care of the screen to me, tripping hook lost my heart, I thought That is love, so head in the clouds. However, I can not respond to half of the facial features, the more times I was afraid he lie deep in my heart inferiority complex and sensitive lakes. In fact, because he trace of the look to my inner sense of inferiority intensified.
  I finally admitted that the famous Beijing NORMAL, think of four years can sit for a city looking for a steady teaching job, I will not like high school is so hard. I started attending a private university in Zhengzhou, the Neo-confession of love, the result he suffered blurred refused. But I come to their senses. One by one the lights in the night, one after another in Beijing Normal University near a blue phone booth, I was incoherent with the love and minds of the Song Mingming said. At that time, I wore the jacket poor students, there is no fashion clothing, each academic year for tuition and living expenses for concern that those students in the family is superior, fair-skinned, dressed to the glamorous girls will not enter dastardly dust But the only love in my heart, like a bright light to illuminate dark unclear my college career.
  I have repeatedly heard from the phone to his cynical Song dorm with ridicule, ridicule my ridiculous obsession with his dedication and struggle. Shrill laugh that made my heart ache to fragmentation.
  However, they are in after a night's sleep, with the second day of the rising sun is still strong.
  I have been walking more than half of Beijing, only to find a birthday present for the Neo, many years later, lodge logs fall, simple and elegant style of wind chimes still live in my memory of them, their impact When the issue of a clear and elegant sound, echoing in my youth. I would like Neo, we must dispose of it easily, and certainly is so. Campanula sent soon after because of his love, I dialed his cell phone, the girl answered the phone, she said she knew me, she told me to tell her to see caller ID Song in Beijing will be the area code he was covered in goose bumps, he was afraid of me, like fear of a patient,
  I think I'm really sick. Piece covered with black locust in the Beijing streets, I run forward, burst into tears. A full two years, I never started off with a first love, which insists on going out for two years. Never hold hands, have not been committed, nor had the slightest return. I'm in love I am the only one vortex inside, stick to despair, and finally sank, subsequently fell in the abyss of the cold paint dark romance, start to finish, the play the only role I am the only one.
  That night, I cried myself to call far in Luoyang to study the lotus, I am disappointed that she was speechless.
  long silence after she said: \not on the course line. We are poor that there is no wrong, his father is an officer and then to the big cities is not shit, you are upright Beijing university student, he went to Beijing does not do is. our class you get the best universities, college entrance examination the highest score, I do not know when you read, arrogance gone, and all feel ashamed for you. \. She can see but can not share too dismissive.
  However, with growing up, I just ripped the tragic character of the tip of the iceberg.
  After that, I am probably the one by a man toward the shoulder.
  hole in the huge city,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], my body could not carry the heart Kongmang. I'm afraid of being alone, I'm afraid no one stormy night, to talk to people. I casually find a another person, in addition to Lin, who are men. Since the day his mother passed away, my life lost sense of security. I have low self-esteem, defenseless, easily hurt, broken.
  fellow junior year when I told the boys a good looking, love, back to Zhengzhou, after working a beat in his post-split. I am not a self-love person. Then three months with a recognition, large-year-old Nanyang his men to get married. I do not care who did not learn to love, and finally, three months later, he left because of inability to bear. My marriage had almost no starting over, just as I love sour. Since then, my life is impressively close to the divorce of a column label. Divorce blow from left to germinate the moment, become even more severe, more and more robust, destroy my life, heart and faith.
  Each time, the lotus in my side. See my life. Because of stubborn, she said those words, I have not accepted.
  She has yet to work after graduation, her boyfriend hanging around in there. Later, went into a Daily, the car special edition. Boyfriend involved in IT, to do his own company, specializing in ring tones business, the company grew and grew, set up branch offices in Beijing after a year. Zhengzhou, she quit work, went to Beijing with her husband, and occasionally to the magazine, Xie Gaozi, and lived a leisurely life of the petty bourgeoisie.
  Zhengzhou,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], I refuse to live in their purchase of 200 square feet big house, so humble I will render to infinity, I do not need to live on charity, these words, I did not tell Lin listen.
  I will be lonely guy with a strange, time and again by the reality hit and then re-sinking of disappointment. I do not believe in love and simple, the other is, the city had been bitten by the marriage of love Yihuo single men and women are still probably the case.
  long after, and finally find a soulmate and love of men can be admitted, I have no profiling on luxury, but fortunately he was not vulgar, but also dwarf the short, fat, fat also, in operation for two years, the ability to count strongman is also funny. Because I was too afraid to lose, so especially cherish and strive to not self, love and care, care for me. Two years and is one year, my heart gets quiet. Who knows, fell in love almost three years of the end of his life, the marriage between the Sonata Symphony, I, I never met the bride is a woman Xinxiang, Maternal and Child Health Hospital in Zhengzhou, a nurse.
  I look forward to his theory of hysteria. He told me different, he never married. He said he was a dutiful son, he is the pride of their family. He put me with his family, his mother divorced woman looking for that dare to get married, she immediately hit the wall to die.
  I will never again be in Beijing when it was crying. Of life for many years I learned not to cry easily. I was twenty nine years old, taught me to do this by public secondary schools, other colleagues one by one along the wind Euparagonimus, marriage pregnant, the only in my wandering.
  Lin pregnant, pregnant with her husband of lotus in the May Day tour to Switzerland, where they sent me back to the photos, wrote to me that I'm most worried about the most worried about. I looked at the Swiss bank's former slightly elevated her belly, leaned to the right side of the intimacy of husband fell in love around eleven years, she said those words,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], I suddenly give birth to hate Italy.
  years, between us, how far away from it? If still yesterday we used to hanging around in the county of West Street, eat five cents a bunch of sugar-coated haws; shop in the winter snow on the outskirts of a walk, watching the snow glow green barley grass; together in the spring when the road was well-intentioned Workers holding climbed into the train bound for Zhengzhou.
  ... ...
  tomorrow, you will hear me cry, I still did not dare, accompanied by attentive, and comfort me? I will need?
  my sister.
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